my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
