No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please hurry up and come back. This is so awkward. He's showing me banana videos.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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