Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
FUCK YOU. AH. FUCK BOTH OF US MORE BOOZE.
MAS TEQUILA.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
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