Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
I already brushed my teeth, and it's not even noon yet. Today's going to be a productive day.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
Let me be the 15% helpful, 85% useless as shit angel on your shoulder.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize