she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Randomize
