Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
wrigley field is MILF paradise
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
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