She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
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