apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
