Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
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