Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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