She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
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they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
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I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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