I'd wear matching sweaters with you
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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