Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I made a wizard staff out of Keystone light... I am therefore the smoothest wizard in all of our university's history.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
