i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
This wedding is gonna be a disaster. I already had to turn down one of the groomsmen who offered me $100 to sleep with him next wknd.
Too low?
Yes.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
