Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
