Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
So for two years my friend Mark has been building a catapult in his basement. Yesterday he realized it's too big to get it out.
You need to give me a reason immediately why he is your friend.
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
This will be the 3rd time you have blacked out and lost your phone only to have some kind stranger find it, charge it, call me, then mail it back to you. Your luck amazes me...
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Randomize
