I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
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As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.