Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.

(1-202): View more from Washington, DC

I mean not really

(202): View more from Washington, DC

Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.

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(202): Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult. (1-202): I mean not really (202): Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible. http://tfl.nu/azl7

Replies (25) Good night (3000) Bad night (870)
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(917): View more from New York City

Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?

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(917 ): Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"? http://tfl.nu/0dpt

Replies (15) Good night (671) Bad night (2849)
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(720): View more from Colorado

yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers

(1-720): View more from Colorado

eat her like coffee?

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(720): yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers (1-720): eat her like coffee? http://tfl.nu/6p99

Replies (19) Good night (1375) Bad night (3379)
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(540): View more from Virginia

I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments

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(540): I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments http://tfl.nu/peng

Replies (7) Good night (6037) Bad night (855)
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(307): View more from Wyoming

you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood

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(307): you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood http://tfl.nu/ts9e

Replies (19) Good night (6558) Bad night (1076)
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(865): View more from Tennessee

I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...

(615): View more from Tennessee

Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again

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(865): I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out... (615): Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again http://tfl.nu/gvsb

Replies (15) Good night (1816) Bad night (4243)
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(817): View more from Texas

you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for

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(817): you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for http://tfl.nu/dk1d

Replies (24) Good night (1383) Bad night (4336)
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(913): View more from Kansas

I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!

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(913): I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?! http://tfl.nu/fugu

Replies (67) Good night (2010) Bad night (4700)
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(630): View more from Illinois

We are two peas in an std pod

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(630): We are two peas in an std pod http://tfl.nu/62ho

Replies (12) Good night (1027) Bad night (5708)
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(209): View more from California

I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.

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(209): I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that. http://tfl.nu/8ygm

Replies (3) Good night (2510) Bad night (967)
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(850): View more from Florida

It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.

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(850): It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons. http://tfl.nu/qh0d

Replies (8) Good night (957) Bad night (2601)
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(239): View more from Florida

dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.

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(239): dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me. http://tfl.nu/b0dd

Replies (15) Good night (4386) Bad night (1219)
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(208): View more from Idaho

It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."

(1-208): View more from Idaho

My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."

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(208): It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate." (1-208): My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time." http://tfl.nu/9ozo

Replies (3) Good night (1218) Bad night (623)
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(817): View more from Texas

I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.

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(817): I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be. http://tfl.nu/oevd

Replies (2) Good night (618) Bad night (995)
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(858): View more from California

Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.

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(858): Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water. http://tfl.nu/wcrd

Replies (2) Good night (469) Bad night (764)

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