all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
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uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
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I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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