windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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