the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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