She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
