and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
I just found puke in my bra..
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
My dick has a subreddit
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
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