i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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