In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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