Texts From Last Night

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  (808): View more from Hawaii

  The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.

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  (808): The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet. http://tfl.nu/mtia
  Replies (12) Good night (1413) Bad night (686)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them

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  (443): at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them http://tfl.nu/jmz8
  Replies (12) Good night (3690) Bad night (998)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...

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  (509): I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber... http://tfl.nu/856a
  Replies (63) Good night (776) Bad night (4131)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.

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  (757): He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish. http://tfl.nu/lwox
  Replies (42) Good night (20213) Bad night (1178)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.

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  (847): You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive. http://tfl.nu/z8kz
  Replies (19) Good night (7152) Bad night (1238)
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  (973): View more from New Jersey

  That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.

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  (973): That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that. http://tfl.nu/drll
  Replies (13) Good night (2134) Bad night (801)
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  (626): View more from California

  I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for

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  (626): I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for http://tfl.nu/u8ph
  Replies (4) Good night (1281) Bad night (524)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.

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  (513): Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone. http://tfl.nu/y1zp
  Replies (15) Good night (1557) Bad night (930)
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.

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  (775): True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob. http://tfl.nu/jwe6
  Replies (8) Good night (1047) Bad night (474)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER

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  (613): NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER http://tfl.nu/1x2h
  Replies (10) Good night (444) Bad night (1297)
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  (574): View more from Indiana

  Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others

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  (574): Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others http://tfl.nu/5o0g
  Replies (4) Good night (1128) Bad night (638)
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.

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  (781): MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE. http://tfl.nu/t2xt
  Replies (4) Good night (548) Bad night (307)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.

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  (203): They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man. http://tfl.nu/uirl
  Replies (2) Good night (784) Bad night (273)
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  (620): View more from Kansas

  I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..

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  (620): I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life.. http://tfl.nu/aqyo
  Replies (3) Good night (521) Bad night (272)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.

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  (561): His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger. http://tfl.nu/j2rh
  Replies (3) Good night (304) Bad night (988)

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