Texts From Last Night

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  (848): View more from New Jersey

  it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away

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  (848): it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away http://tfl.nu/wxvn
  Replies (17) Good night (997) Bad night (6196)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.

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  (303): I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history. http://tfl.nu/d9a3
  Replies (20) Good night (6708) Bad night (915)
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.

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  (774): It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God. http://tfl.nu/c3gg
  Replies (75) Good night (24481) Bad night (1378)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.

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  (313): Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack. http://tfl.nu/j0gt
  Replies (20) Good night (4631) Bad night (1055)
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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON

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  (843): REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON http://tfl.nu/qqb2
  Replies (12) Good night (1371) Bad night (2597)
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  (212): View more from New York

  Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.

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  (212): Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom. http://tfl.nu/fuov
  Replies (19) Good night (939) Bad night (4726)
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  (352): View more from Florida

  Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested

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  (352): Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested http://tfl.nu/s1lm
  Replies (15) Good night (917) Bad night (2061)
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  (650): View more from California

  It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.

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  (650): It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag. http://tfl.nu/hxfk
  Replies (3) Good night (1317) Bad night (676)
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  (905): View more from Ontario

  foreskin is a definite game changer

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  (905): foreskin is a definite game changer http://tfl.nu/oi5r
  Replies (24) Good night (1104) Bad night (992)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.

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  (303): He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door. http://tfl.nu/ylk0
  Replies (3) Good night (1507) Bad night (580)
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.

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  (706): You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT. http://tfl.nu/osv9
  Replies (4) Good night (1039) Bad night (424)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.

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  (724): Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is. http://tfl.nu/p6ee
  Replies (1) Good night (528) Bad night (830)
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  (949): View more from California

  Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.

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  (949): Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults. http://tfl.nu/b902
  Replies (0) Good night (817) Bad night (363)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  Why so serious bruh

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  (604): In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address. (778): Why so serious bruh http://tfl.nu/48qn
  Replies (1) Good night (368) Bad night (531)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis

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  (224): Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis http://tfl.nu/y26w
  Replies (5) Good night (391) Bad night (183)

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