I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
