I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
