Plan B is the new Plan A
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
