Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
