So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
Also, our mothers are placing bets on which of us will get pregnant first.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
