hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
