Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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