I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
he's gonorrhea incarnate
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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