So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Randomize
