are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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