Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize