Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
