Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I have feelings that need drinking.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
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