I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Randomize
