I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
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you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
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Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
I just got the high sucked out of me. Fuck.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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