We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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