i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize