so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
If I had a sex resume I'd get tons of jobs.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
