I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
