I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
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Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
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That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize