Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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