I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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