I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Randomize
