the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
