have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
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