if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
