Texts From Last Night

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  (330): View more from Ohio

  It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table

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  (330): It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table http://tfl.nu/2wbi
  Replies (24) Good night (1102) Bad night (3998)
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  (432): View more from Texas

  He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"

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  (432): He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun" http://tfl.nu/hrdc
  Replies (28) Good night (2826) Bad night (4387)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.

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  (317): for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7. http://tfl.nu/34yz
  Replies (13) Good night (784) Bad night (3383)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.

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  (864): so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence. http://tfl.nu/nvim
  Replies (20) Good night (7870) Bad night (1171)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?

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  (314): Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me? http://tfl.nu/x7by
  Replies (35) Good night (2571) Bad night (10243)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts

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  (512): Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts http://tfl.nu/16ua
  Replies (9) Good night (476) Bad night (1007)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.

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  (304): It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town. http://tfl.nu/067f
  Replies (14) Good night (756) Bad night (1001)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.

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  (608): I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich. http://tfl.nu/h4vr
  Replies (3) Good night (375) Bad night (818)
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  (+61): View more from Australia

  I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.

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  (+61): I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that. http://tfl.nu/nlmq
  Replies (2) Good night (401) Bad night (967)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.

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  (248): Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good. http://tfl.nu/i36t
  Replies (1) Good night (392) Bad night (571)
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?

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  (774): I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex (603): College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh? http://tfl.nu/q4kf
  Replies (1) Good night (930) Bad night (371)
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.

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  (337): I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it. http://tfl.nu/cfzm
  Replies (1) Good night (616) Bad night (355)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon

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  (480): The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon http://tfl.nu/h5eu
  Replies (0) Good night (321) Bad night (566)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex

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  (302): Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex http://tfl.nu/650g
  Replies (0) Good night (343) Bad night (193)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't

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  (630): Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't http://tfl.nu/ryom
  Replies (0) Good night (278) Bad night (128)

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